Wednesday, 31 December 2008

Happy New Year

Emma is going out to a party tonight she tells me it has something to do with this being the last day of 2008. Apparently people like to look back over the year counting up their achievements and making promises to do something even better next year. It all sounds a bit odd to me. Admittedly I have plenty of achievements to look back on (Starring in a film, two television appearances, nine radio interviews, featuring in seven newspaper / magazine articles and worldwide exposure on the Internet, all that on top of being a single parent family) but what's Emma got to look back on? I suppose in her defense it will be easy to do something better next year.

Now that's going to be a real problem for me!


Friday, 19 December 2008

The V.E.T. Returns!

Thank you Tam for your offer to join our sponsored feast. We have replied to you in the comment section underneath the Charity Events article. I hope you are not too disappointed!

The man with the limp came back again today. (If you don’t remember him then you can read our October 07 article). I don’t know why Emma invites him when he just attacks us. He was on to Berry as well this time! And he even brought a friend (another V.E.T.!) along to ‘watch the show’.

He tried to put this funny jelly on our tummies and Berry stupidly let him! But I wasn’t having any of that. Not after him poking me with pins last time. So I made a tiny itsy bitsy little bit of a fuss. Not much - I only wanted him to stop it. So I bucked and I growled and I howled and I thrashed about and I tried to bite him. And I think I got the message across.

Apparently he was trying to see if there was anything in our tummies. Why on earth would we want anything (apart from food of course) in our tummies? At one point when he had this jelly stuff on Berry’s tummy, he and his friend squealed about being able to ‘see something’. How long does it take them to realise that if you open your eyes, you can see stuff? Emma’s mum said that they thought they could see something inside Berry’s tummy, but that’s just stupid; how could they possibly see through all that flab?

When the V.E.T.s went Emma’s mum told me off for misbehaving and being ‘a baby’. Well how would she like it if he went about attacking her? Then, she went and gave Berry extra rations for having something inside her. I insisted that I had something inside me too, but because I wouldn’t stay still for the V.E.T. he hadn’t been able to tell if there was anything in my tummy or not. So I had to go without the extra food.

What sort of ‘something’ in Berry’s tummy is important enough to get her extra rations anyway? She’s fat enough as it is!


Monday, 8 December 2008

Charity Events

We were fed even earlier than usual yesterday. Emma said it was because of a car boot sale her family had a stall at. Apparently Emma's Granddad is doing a walk across the Sinai Desert and up Mount Sinai and Emma and her family are helping to raise money for it. I can't understand why anyone would want to walk across a hot sandy desert where there are no wallows to cool off in and nothing to root up but Emma said her Granddad was doing this to raise money for various cancer charities. Emma has put the details on her website

Emma said people raise money for good causes by doing all sorts of things. For example some people do parachute jumps, or take a bath in baked beans!

We had a bit of a think about all this last night and decided we would like to help too. So we are proposing to do a sponsored feast. We will be paid to eat as much as possible in 24 hours. We haven't told Emma about this idea yet but I'm sure she will be pleased. She will have to provide the food but it will be for a good cause.

We'll let you know when we have sorted it out so you will be able to sponsor us!